Mga bakla, sing bilis ng bagyong Goring ang pagexit ko sa Malaysia. Dito na ako after a one-week exile to the Moslem world of curry at roti. I missed pork, steak, baby back ribs, and titi! Chos. Jusmio purga ang beauty kech sa culinary trip ng mga Malaysians. It was gastronomic adventure of sorts—nasi dagang, roti jala (which sometimes replaces the rice staple served with various types of gravy) at kung anik-anik pa.
To say that I enjoyed the experience is underlining the obvious. I’ve set my eyes on the phallic two-tower Petronas which was a sight to behold, like Malaysia’s other architectural marvels. Who would’ve thought that this once lowly state would now be at par with other Asian countries? Ang inet sa KL nang sufir, with intermittent rains. Manila’s weather is far better, mas malayo tayo sa equator remember?
Okay on to other matters, nasaan ang mga umbaw? Witchell nakaiskor si Cinderella. Booo. Except for some landian portion with Pinoys I met at the hotel bar and lobby on my last night, there were no kuping and uras portions. Pinantasya ko lang ang mga machas (read hot Indian men in MY and SG) at mga foreigners who I bumped into. Nagbayas ako nang sufir. Bakit? I feared for my dear life. Remember the case of Prime Minister Anwar Ibrahim who was pressed with sodomy charges in 2000? Ayoko mategi sa Malaysian land.
I checked in at Marroitt Putrajaya, good thing I’m a Marriott Rewards card holder unlimited ang wired Internet ko sa room. Bunggakels, may silbi ang pagiging suki.
On my first day, I went for a swim after breakfast at the newly opened Zest restaurant. The pool attendant is Nazril. I hinted on him to no success. I told him to join me in the pool he just looked at me and smiled. Di ko naman bet masyado, I just tried if he’d bite. He said he wanted a picture so I obliged. Chararat anech?
Then rumampage akechiwa sa lobby and sightseeing. May event ata ang Shell Asia, andaming Shell VIPs. Kaloka ang sea of yellow sa buffet place at sa hotel lobby. I inched my way to him. I said I was a Filipino staying at the same hotel. “Wow, Philippines?” “YES!,” I said with matching abaniko to show.” This guy drove me hard, I wanted to grope his behind and kneel on him. His name is Alex.
But the man who totally seized my heart a cameraman from Singapore covering an event at the Sepang F1 Circuit. Good thing my friends and I dropped by Sepang to marvel the world-class race track. The boy was jaw-dropping I wanna suck him right there and then. But he was so busy, eh?
I was told Malaysian actor Fahrin Amad was in the area, so Cinderella went up the paddock area and squeezed my way to have my picture taken with him. There were so much media around I told the security I was one of them. Echoserang froglet! Fahrin gained weight, compared to the days he was in the Carmen Soo-Kristine Hermosa show.
I wish. I saw him off clothes.
Nakakapagod nang sufir ang Putrajaya-Sepang-Kuala Lumpur trip kechiwa. I felt I was ripped by the taxis who charged me exaggerated. Imagine from airport to the hotel I paid like 65 ringgit (P1,000 pesos) for a 30-minute drive. Kaloka. So if you head to KL, learn to ride the train and the bus. Wag magtaxi. I bought some pasalubong goodies at Petraling Street, downtown KL. It was their version of Chinatown where people haggle with the best Chinese and local finds.
I’m back in Manila Saturday night. I crave titi. But early morning Monday, I’m Davao-bound. Dun naman ang conference ng bakla. Pagoda na. Humanda kayo chuchupain ko kayo!